The first time you have sex, you’ll probably have a million questions or misconceptions and that’s completely normal! We all could use a sex talk and considering we don’t usually get one in school or at home, we are here to help you! Keep scrolling to read the 6 things you should know before you have sex for the first time – hopefully you’ll be more at ease after!
1. How To Engage In Safe Sex
First and foremost, it’s important to know what protected sex is and how to engage in it. There are various methods of contraception that will protect you not just from pregnancy, but from STI’s as well. Regardless of it being yours and your partner’s first time, you should protect yourself from potential STI’s because some of them, such as herpes or genital warts, can be spread through skin to skin contact. Condoms are generally a safe option to avoid STI’s, but when it comes to pregnancy, it might be a better idea for you to consider birth control pills. They consist of hormones that essentially put a stop to the ovulation process, but it’s important to have them everyday in order to avoid getting pregnant. There are also different types of birth control pills, mainly combination pills and progestin pills and the amount of days they take to kick in varies, so be sure to consult with your doctor and find what’s best suited for you!
2. Consent Is EXTREMELY Important
If there’s one thing to be aware of, it’s consent. It’s okay to say no if you’re uncomfortable, and to voice certain reservations you might have. Marital sex doesn’t always equate to consensual sex, so make sure you know that and make your partner aware of your desires and needs. If you want to say no to something, it’s okay to say no to it and have a conversation with your partner about it.
3. Communicate With Your Partner
Communication is key in every aspect of a relationship and it’s no different during sex. Let your partner know what you want and if at any point you need to take it slow or feel like it’s hurting too much, you shouldn’t feel like you can’t express it. It’s important to communicate with each other about what your desires are, as well as what your limits are. Only do what you’re comfortable with!
4. Always Pee After It!
This might not seem important, but trust us – if you’re a girl, you should definitely pee after sex! It greatly reduces the chance of getting a urinary tract infection by cleaning the urethra from harmful bacteria. A UTI is when a part of your urinary trade gets infected and often causes a burning sensation when you pee – something nobody wants! Peeing before sex won’t completely safeguard you from a UTI, but it will lower the chances of it. After all, prevention is key!
5. It’s Not Necessary That You’ll Bleed
It’s completely normal to experience some bleeding after you have sex for the first time because chances are, your hymen might stretch or tear. However, it’s also okay if you don’t experience bleeding – not everyone does! Tampon usage, horse-riding, complicated yoga poses or other athletic sports may have already torn your hymen before. Lubrication is also extremely important and another reason for bleeding could be not enough of it, leading to friction that in turn causes pain. So don’t be alarmed if it’s your first time and you aren’t bleeding!
6. It’s Okay To Be Nervous
Everything is daunting the first time. Meeting somebody new, the first day of college away from home, skydiving, your first job interview – even something as simple as getting your eyebrows done! Having sex the first time is no different. It’s completely okay to be nervous and have some reservations, but remember our third point (communication!) and everything will be a lot easier. Go at your own pace and figure it out as you go! Remember, it will get better with time. Like most things, sex also takes time to get a hang of and practice makes perfect!